What a morning and some has not even awake yet! I decided to start the day by doing history essay and it was such a wrong move. I am so disappointed because so much hints were given, even a sample essay was there to guide us! But i just couldnt do it. Probably because i wanted it to be amazing, mind blowing thus inability to do so led me to breakdown severely. I know i shouldnt really expect much from myself because this is my first time doing it. But i had expectations of my own and now that i didnt meet it, imagine the disappointment. It has been a terrible morning and now i am going around the house the whole day mopping, at something so silly! I even had to give ly's house a miss because of these silly feelings but these moodswings are really crazy and right now i just wanna bang the laptop just because.
I shouldnt be miserable, i have so much to be thankful for (as cliche as it sounds) but i am talking about myself and i think i deserve to feel miserable for myself because come on, admit it, who exists in your world? Only yourself. The feelings has been around for quite some time now and even yesterday when i lost my wallet that had my all my money inside, i felt nothing and practically had no reaction. My friends had to literally give me a boost to go find it and when i found it, ok here it is, in a monotonous tone. Amazing how i can feel nothing even though im the one always feeling the most (no, not in the perasan kind of way-.-) and forever worrying.
There were so many happy things i wanted to talk about (i even wrote it in a piece of ppr!!!!!) but i am feeling so miserable for myself now so i shall find a pillow and give the day a miss~