Last July at sastera camp, she asked for us to think of an event that makes us sad and be prepared to share with everyone. This girl came up and shared that she feels sad that she did not get to know one of her grandparents because they had left even before she was born. She was sad because she kept hearing stories about them and she wished she had known them.
Today in the bus I was thinking about it and what happened in the bus made me make the same wish that she said. I boarded the bus and there was this man, who was quite old, old enough to be my grandfather. He was wearing his kopiah, and white tshirt and very thick glasses. I kept looking at him from the back, unable to stop looking. I thought, had my grandfather been alive, he would have probably looked like that. From the pictures i saw of my late grandfather, my granddad had worn thick glasses. His face shape looked similar to the old man in the bus. I have heard many stories about my granddad and at that moment i felt sad, because i was not able to meet him and get to know him and ask stories about his childhood and watch him smile hear him laugh. But life and death is not really for us to determine so despite that i am sad i accept that i didnt get to meet him.
I was swayed away by my thoughts till i saw what the old man did next. There was this man who wanted to tap his ezlink card. So from his seat which was quite far from the tapping machine, he stretched out his hand right infront of the old man who was standing at the door. The old man then looked at the man in horror and his expression said it all- ape die pikir ni letak tangan die dpn2 muke aku mcm gini!!! I laughed when i saw it because i thought it was cute and funny and i imagine, had my granddad been alive, he would probably look as cute as that hey?
It is quite sad to think of the people that we did not get to meet and know. I feel that there is a part missing in me, because i did not get to meet my granddad. But someday, someday im sure i will meet him, in a beautiful place called Jannah.
And what makes me sad? Well knowing that my parents, especially my dad, worked so hard to give me such a good life and everything (really) that i wanted and yet i do not really appreciate it but instead i keep asking for more and never give anythg in return (no good grades, no great achievement to be proud of, just a great lousy attitude that always hurt their feelings in every single way). This makes me really sad.