Hi today is most probably the last teachers day celebration i'll have in secondary school and i enjoyed every single moment of it. I decided to keep it happy and not be moody despite the raging hormones in it and i succeeded yay me. The day started off with a mass dance and it was so cute except that all our us have hips that wont shake. Nfa was late but at least she made it. We tried and hilmi represented us with the moves that was so priceless. I cant dance, never will i guess but i enjoyed watching at ppl dance(and making a fool of themselves haha). Then we had to go to the field to play frisbee and it was sweltering hot lah please. I found shade near a tree and from there i can see the landscape of the field and what is happening. At one side, the sec5s were sitting together, regardless of what class they were from. They were swinging on the ropes and posing and being oh-so-cute. It was funny looking at them and i realised from the way they joked that it didnt matter what class they're from, they are all friends. I looked at my class and at 4b and 4c and wonder if we'll be like that. Probably not cus we're such a huge bunch but probably yes cus we meet diff ppl from diff class in eng and cca etc. Then i took a look at my class and how we are separated. The boys at one side talking about some boys stuff and the girls at this wobbly thingy and just swinging it forward backward forward backward. It didnt bother me that we're separated like that, i guess we just prefer to be with people we're comfortable with. But im scared, scared that if we leave sch we regret for not getting closer to the other ppl in our class. I just sat one corner looking at them, not joining them cus i dont knw who i wanna be with. I wanna be with the ones im comfortable with but there is one in the clique that isnt comfortable with me. I wanna get closer to the ones im not close with but how can i just join them? In the end i decided to just keep it light and fuck the haters. I joined my chinese girls. We played with the wobbly thingy and put on our imagination cap. We were on some exotic sea and cruising down thru it, complete with alligators and all. Of course ppl were irritated at the noise we're generating and staring at us like complete fools but who cares man. Im still young and there's a kid in me. Not always i act childishly(i think) and i enjoyed being imaginative. I laughed alot and i felt kinda happy, like i dont need to care for anythg else in the world. It was funnnn(L)
Then i watched at the people playing the frisbee. I think its a great game cause it gives a chance for everyone to learn how to play together and most importantly be patient. It was tough, since someone couldnt throw or catch the frisbee properly and had to give chance to them to get the hang of it. I saw different expressions, anger and joy among all. They were frustrated that their friends couldnt catch or throw properly. They were happy that finally the frisbee made it through the line. There were many expressions, of wanting to scream at their friends, of wanting to just shout when the frisbee couldnt reach their teammates. But everyone kept their cool. The best part was that no matter how bad they failed they encouraged each other and never let themselves be angry at their teammates. I guess thats what playing together is all about. If we were to apply it to daily life, in academic especially, all of us would be successful together.
Then we had the concert which i seriously enjoyed. I have to congratulate the 15th council board for putting up a show and for the performers to make it so successful. I was seriously amazed at their talent which they have kept in them for so long. It was so unexpected and i had fun being the audience.
After all has ended i was contemplating to go back to my primary school, or not. Then aisyah texted me and told me to go and i was like oh what can i lose lets go. I didnt lose anythg, in fact i gained alot. When i entered the hall and looked at my batch, i was so happy i came back. It was a time to destroy old crushes with the ones i thought was hot and renew them with the ones who has grown to be such a sight. Heeeeeeeeeeehe. Kay no lah, eventhough some has really grown to be so hot. Heh i met my friends who i have seen in so many light years. It was like facebook goes reality. We talked and exchanged numbers. I meet my mother tongue teachers and thanked them profusely cus they instilled the luv for malay language in me. It was so nice seeing them and i wished we had more time to catch up. I saw an old crush with his new girlfriend that he was proudly showcasing and i felt like nak muntah. Like puhhhhhlease it was so tak perlu kay. But whatever, i met other friends and forgot about him. Apparently the best part of it was that some of them didnt get over their old crushes in primary school. It was so adorable seeing them being shy with each other, like we're still so young and innocent(not that we're not now haha). Then the whole bunch of us lepak at someplace cool ceh tak lah and talked. Then came an awkward moment when we had nothing to talk abt and someone said Aku Lapar. We then talked about food till we had enough of each other and went home. I didnt regret going back and i relived what its like to be in primary school, with no O lvl to worry about haha. I met all the people i used to have fun with and it made me happy, knowing that we have reconnected and nothing can break the friendship we have among us.
But it didnt end there. A group of us went to break fast at al ameen and we continued our talking. We talked about what else, boys and old crushes. It was really weird that even after 4 years some of them still have feelings for the one they last met since pri6. They get shy talking about it and avoid getting into the topic. My wondergirls were there except for three of them but it was alright. Everyone didnt dramatically change, they were still as annoying and irritating and gile gile since i last met them. The frenchman was there too and he said smthg so bad about my bff that i mcm nak throw the water at him. He eventually apologized and thank god for it cus i was really mad he said that. Then we had to leave. It was wonderful perfect the best and i wished for the night to not end. But wished dont always come true and we had to say goodbye.
I cant say how much i enjoyed the day and night with the people who i had known since so very young. This day shall live in me and i will remember how we used to be jealous and hate each other over silly things. Now that we're grown up we've learnt to forget and to just love and be happy in each other's company. Cause for me, these people make me feel so young and that nothing else in the world matter as long as we have each other.
Two things that made me wanna cry was that when the two bestfriends i had since young hugged each other and finally talked a lil. I dont knw if the tension is still there or not but now i knw its all gonna be well in the end. The second thing was that when Atikah ensured me that no matter how different our background and social life is, we will always be friends. I wanted to cry cus it was such the sweetest thing to say. We will always be friends.
Today i woke up and the quote No Expectation No Disappointment came to mind. Now i truly understand the mind. If only i had picture this day in my head before, i would not have enjoyed it this much cus if it didnt live up to my expectation, i would be too busy being disappointed to enjoy it. Now i wanna live my life enjoying every single silly thing and just go with the flow, no expectation.
This way i will always be happy.